Who are the unsung heroes of any college audition season? The parents and relatives! You arranged all of the travel to college auditions (and have added "rockstar college audition chauffeur" to your list of parental special skills). You calmed down your daughter or son after every meltdown/freakout/moment of doubt. You were the first to cheer the loudest after an awesome college audition. The past few months, you may have felt a little like the Anne Hathaway to your daughter's/son's Meryl Streep...
Now that the college auditions are over, the waiting begins and the feelings of "Did we audition at enough colleges? It's so competitive, what if he/she doesn't get in anywhere?" start to set in.
Here are 5 Tips to Handle the
College Audition Results Waiting Game (Parent Edition)
1. Try to get back to "normal life."
Your college audition daughter/son might be unusually anxious and moody, especially as the month progresses and he/she starts to hear back from top choices. The answer might be an acceptance (yay!), a waitlist (stay tuned for next week's blog: Tips for Getting off the College Audition Waitlist), or a rejection (never easy to hear). Trying to create a sense of normalcy and not become obsessive about checking in to see if other people (friends and online forums) have heard yet or bringing it up is helpful.
2. Stay calm and supportive.
A rejection at a dream school is difficult for any student, but a BFA rejection can sting even more because it inherently makes students doubt whether or not they are "good enough" or "talented enough" or "pretty enough." You might get defensive, you might feel heartbroken for your child, you might feel relieved. Whatever you are feeling, be a good listener. Be a shoulder to cry on. Continue to be the positive and supportive figure in his/her life that you have been for the past 17 or 18 years.
3. Don't let a "Top 10" BFA rejection overshadow other college acceptances.
Remind your student of the victories so far. Whether it's an acceptance to an academic school or a BFA acceptance at another college, there are many paths to achieving the same performing arts goals. A rejection of any kind, of course, will sting, but try to remain as positive as possible. Also, remember that so much of the college audition process is subjective, so a denial at one college doesn't necessarily mean that this will happen across the board. There are way too many factors out of your control for this to be the case.
4. Spend some time with your significant other/partner, family, other children, friends, and pets.
You most likely have traveled to college auditions quite a bit over the past few months. Hopefully, you had a chance to cherish some alone time with your college audition son/daughter, but now give him/her some space. If there are other loved ones in your life, spend some much-needed quality time with them.
5. Treat yourself to something you love (other than your child)
Whether it's a massage or a mani/pedi, take some "me time" to recover from the ups and downs of the college audition season. Lots of important, crucial decisions await you and your family this month. As decisions and scholarship/financial aid packages are announced, you need to be ready to weigh all of the options. If you need help sorting through the choices, consult with your college audition coach, performing arts teachers, guidance counselors, etc. to help guide you and your family down the right path. If you have any questions, feel free to shoot me an email.
Stay tuned for next week's blog post
Tips for Getting off the College Audition Waitlist
Tom Morin is a NYC-based acting coach, co-founder of Polish Your Passion, and a professional actor/singer. He holds a B.A. in Theatre & Political Science from the College of the Holy Cross and an M.F.A. in Acting from Ohio University and has been teaching for the past 9 years, advising and coaching students through the college audition process and beyond. He loves coffee, Shakespeare, and YouTube.